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Following those unexpected concerts in mid-August:
when ‘SOS-Ortiz’ once again stepped-in at short notice,
to great acclaim, especially
from the press in France (see Press Reviews) – nice, considering
whom I had substituted — I was
to serve on ‘jury-duty’,
at a Piano Competition that is. Unfortunately, this taxing a job,
leads me into deeply-felt
frustration; I wonder if I will
ever accept any future invitations! I’ll try to explain
all that bothered me!
To sit through hour-after-hour of listening in deep concentration,
to so many ‘hopefuls’ – is too-exhausting
a passive task for an active performer like myself— and
for what purpose? If the muscles in my back were the only thing
to suffer from this mauling, I could still reconsider my decision,
but when it’s the essence of my integrity as a musician
that cries in desperation, “alors, là”!
Firstly, when the great revelation of the Competition – a
new Richter, in my opinion— didn’t make it to the finals,
I was quite tempted to go home. Then I detected that a player
with a most obviously disgusting attitude to Music, composers
and colleagues alike was tipped to win: that drove me insane.
Then, the idea that a Jury formed entirely of professional
musicians, is quite content in submitting votes on a piece
of paper without ever uttering a word to express any views
or convictions they may have about the musicality of the candidates
to the title, is beyond belief! At this point I felt gagged,
as if I needed to feed oxygen to my brain. I decided before
the Finals, that had that one player gone on to win, I was
not prepared to stand-by complacently, or be seen to have anything
to do with that result, God forbid as I once did, at the Cliburn!
I honestly believe that the public
usually gets it right and there’s a real possibility
that they would get better results. More often than not, winners
come and … mainly go! Players should become winners only
if by unanimous vote, and that may require long deliberation;
one might again find the Lupus, or the Perahias!
‘ Professional-jurors’ as I refer to some colleagues, never
want to be involved in any sort of confrontation. Their motto:
“stay out of trouble”. Whatever the result, their salary is
guaranteed; and on to the next competition. Two other jurors also
worried about the voting system — at least I’m not mad ...
My friends, when I stop caring, I will let you know!
A surprised student of mine asked: “you mean to say
that outside, the poor candidates sweat away waiting for the
dreaded result, while the Jury waits inside, for that same result, just like puppets? Give me a break!”
One more event this month, almost more frustrating: I had
to play a recital in a venue situated right on the flight path
to Heathrow! And I just couldn’t “fly above the
situation” – forgive the horrible pun! Anybody
would have thought that I’d be able to control the situation,
well NO! I realized more than ever that I do need to hear what
I’m trying to do, thank you very much!
Let’s just say that I am glad to see the back of this
month!
>> My journal
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